Often we fear success more than we feel failure. "Not me" you're probably saying - "I'd love to be successful". But how would your life change if you were successful? What would you have to do differently? Do you think you'll have to work more? Perhaps, have to travel and be away from home? Stay up later or work weekends? Feel under pressure all the time to have the correct answer without feeling like a fool?
So many things might change if you are successful (or become more successful). Many people are afraid of change and when you couple that fear of change with the other fears I mentioned above, it's logical that there will be a certain fear of success.
So what? It's important to accept this fact and then move on. In order to be successful you will have to step out of your comfort zone. That is scary. Right now, you do things the same day after day and even if you have a very busy life, you're still doing essentially the same things repeatedly.
Success means you'll have to change the way you're doing things - maybe even in every aspect of your life. This could be like a person with a brain injury or illness that, once recovered, may have to learn to do everything all over again. That person has no choice. They have to do things differently. You have a choice. At least you have the choice as to whether you want to start this process. This is why the hardest step is the first one.
It all depends on what you want to do. And how much you want to do it. As with goal setting, the WHY is the most important.
Remember how much I talk about vibration. You want to get yourself accustomed to the vibration of a new comfort zone. Take time to focus on what the upside of your success will be. When you see events and start feeling happy with those upside thoughts and feelings, capture them as your "Kodak moment" as I like to call them. Then when you're feeling scared of moving out, recall that Kodak Moment and you'll be able to raise your vibration to a different plane than fear. In fact, if you can keep focusing on those moments then you'll be able to keep your vibration there and not have to be constantly stopping/changing the downward momentum. As you start to experience success, you'll create more moments to focus on. And if you don't have moments of success right now to use and can't create some, concentrate on something you did or experienced in the past that will raise your vibration and keep your momentum going in the direction you want it to go in.
- Determine what success looks like to you
- Determine the "WHY" you want that success - what is it about this achievement that is driving you. Dig deep until you find the strong WHY
- See if you can come up with (and write down) the things that you fear/think will change as a result of the success.
- Consider asking the 4 questions from Byron Katie's "The Work"
Is it true? (Yes or no. If no, move to 3.)
Can you absolutely know that it's true? (Yes or no.)
How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without the thought?
- Turn the thought around. - Then find at least three specific, genuine examples of how each turnaround is true for you in this situation.
- Find your Kodak moment to seize upon when you're feeling concerned or worried or even thinking about these new circumstances and feel yourself developing momentum in a direction you'd rather not go in.
- Use the Kodak moment(s) you've picked whenever you start to work on your achievement or whenever you start to feel antsy.
- Use the special phrase along with the Kodak Moment (or in place of) "Nothing and nobody can interfere with my prosperity, my well-being, my peace of mind, not even myself" - just keep saying that over and over again until you're in a better space and have stopped obsessing about the bad things at least for that time being.
- Reassess your comfort zone each week and start the process over because by now you have stepped out of your comfort zone and have a new set of parameters to work with (and worry about unless you apply this practice). This phase is often called rinse and repeat.
- Journal all these things. Our minds play tricks on us frequently and you don't want to lose the wisdom that you've gained.
- GET A COACH!
Try this process and slowly step outside of your current comfort zone and create a new one.
Let me know how it goes!