I think this is one of the most important points I’ve made in a very long time. Whenever you are complaining or criticizing, you’re putting out negative vibrations and thoughts into the Universe. And even if they are thoughts about someone else or some other situation, the Universe only knows that they are emanating from you! Therefore the Universe simply thinks you want more of that negativity to come into your life.

What good does complaining and criticizing do anyway? Does it accomplish anything? No, of course not. It’s different that stating an issue and presenting a solution if there’s one warranted. If there isn’t a solution needed, then there really isn’t a problem is there? And there’s nothing to complain about. Perhaps it’s something that you’re not overly happy about – let’s say a change requested by your new boss. If there’s no solution you can see, then stop and ask yourself what’s really bothering you. Is it, perhaps, that you just don’t like change and that’s why you’re not happy? Is it that you didn’t think of it and that’s why you’re not happy? Is it because you’ll have to start doing things differently and you are happy and content in your current comfort zone? What really is going on in your mind and your heart? That is what you have to investigate no matter how deep you have to dig. Go within, not without. Complaining and criticizing is going “without”. Whereas the introspection to figure out what is going on inside of you is going “within”. That is growth and will help you learn what is going on inside of you and what to do about it. It may be (but probably isn’t) that there really is a problem and with this in depth look, you’ll come up with a solution. However, it is more likely that you’ll find out more about yourself and then be able to improve your outlook and attract more positive things into your life.

Constant complaining and criticizing also will make you sick because of all the negative energy surrounding you. Negative thoughts and feelings put you in a low level stress response and the excess cortisol that you’re constantly producing in that state will eventually lead to chronic fatigue and lower your immunity. You really can make yourself sick in so many ways. Do you ever say things like “I’m sick and tired” or “I’m fed up” or even worse “This is killing me” or “you make me sick”. These are all affirmations to the Universe to bring you more of what you’re talking about – the Universe does NOT know that these are just expressions.

Unless you turn within and investigate what is making you feel these negative vibrations, you will never grow and progress. The complaining and criticizing will hold you back. It’s just further validation of your limiting beliefs. You never have the chance to explore what those beliefs are and why you have them and more importantly, how to clear them and figure out what you really want to believe. That is the only way you’ll grow and progress. So, if you feel you’re being held back, realize that you are not being held back by anyone or anything. It’s you who are holding yourself back.  You really are and can be in control of your progress and growth. Stop blaming anyone or anything but yourself. What happened in the past is in the past. The present and the future is totally up to you. You can continue to try to blame external sources but that won’t get you anywhere. The Universal Laws operate within you. You really do have control of your life. Of course, with that awareness comes the responsibility to take things into your own hands. Often that is a great burden but it also brings tremendous freedom! Once you know that you can change things, you can bring whatever you want into your life, you feel lighter and happier. And you realize that you have the ability to grow and nurture yourself to a degree you’ve never had before.

Keep track of how often you complain or criticize others. Figure out something to do to change your thoughts and behavior when you find yourself doing that. For example, just say something like “that person is doing the best he can with what he has” or “I’m sure that he has reasons for behaving that way and I just don’t know what they are”. Practice that on easy things like when you start to criticize other drivers or other parents or someone at a grocery store or event. Simple things that really are unimportant. Once you start practicing on those, you’ll find it easier to change the way you think about the more important things in your life.

Let us know what you think about this and if you can see any pattern in your life that has followed this sequence. I know I can.

Terrie