When you hear people say “it’s all in your head” your natural reaction most likely is one of anger and disbelief and astonishment – “how can you possibly think that – this is real?”

Reality is in our heads. Take this action. Write out what the actual facts are. Then everything else is your (or someone else’s) interpretation. And much of that interpretation is based on what we think and believe. If we have limiting beliefs still embedded in the cobwebs of our mind, then the interpretation of those facts will be very negative. If we’ve done a good job of eliminating our limiting beliefs and replacing them with UNlimiting beliefs, the interpretation will be extremely positive.

I’ve talked for many years about limiting beliefs and I feel that it should be a more prevalent topic of discussion than the Law of Attraction. Those who saw “The Secret” and later said it was baloney and didn’t work were not aware of the power of limiting beliefs and how they control all our thoughts, feelings, actions AND results! Your beliefs are what governs your feelings and subsequently your thoughts.

We accumulate our beliefs very early in life – from birth, if not before. They come from our parents, our family, peers, friends, colleagues, teachers, religious leaders, media, bosses, national leaders and anyone around us. Some of the beliefs are stronger than others. The more we are exposed to ideas and the more we respect or love a person, the more likely it is that we will adopt their ideas as our own beliefs.

As Abraham-Hicks says “A belief is just a thought we keep thinking over and over again”. When we think it over and over and over, it seems as if it must be real to us and so we start to believe it. But it is NOT necessarily reality. Remember that everyone felt the earth was flat. But it isn’t. They also thought that no one would ever be able to run a mile in less than 4 minutes – but it’s been done many times now. Think of all the things we have at our fingertips now – all the inventions. Were they ever thought to be possible? No – not until someone received the divine idea and chose to believe that it was possible. Once things are “visible” to others, they can become the subject of a new belief – such as the earth is round. Anyone now a days who believes that the earth is flat would be laughed at.

This should be (and probably will be) a multi-part “rule” because there are many different parts that need to be addressed (and are better addressed in some of our courses).

You have to understand that we are our own worst enemies. What if a baby was self-deprecating and each time it fell down while trying to learn to walk it said “gees, you’re really stupid – you fell down again. How dumb can you be?” or “Why can’t I get that right – I just started doing it yesterday, you’d think I’d be able to walk by now – there must be something wrong with me.” Or “I’ll never get it. Why bother?”.

Thank goodness children have not yet been overwhelmed with these horrible limiting beliefs and thoughts that if they don’t succeed and do everything perfectly on day 1 that they are “bad” people. If so, they would never do or try anything.

Why do we do that to ourselves as older children and then repeatedly as adults? Because somewhere along the way someone (or many someones) have made a statement that we interpreted as a criticism or statement that we were bad people. It may not have really been intended that way but that is the way we perceived it. You’ve heard the phrase “perception is reality”. Well, that is so very true, especially in our own worlds and involving our own ego. If someone is having a bad day and comments on something we say or do but it doesn’t sound all cheery and enthusiastic, we are likely to interpret it as them not approving or worse yet, them criticizing us. When, in reality (their reality), they are NOT enthusiastic about ANYTHING at that moment except, perhaps, making their bad day go away. That has absolutely nothing to do with us and our performance. But since children believe that the world revolves around them, the pattern of interpreting others actions in terms of their own world is established. So, unless this other person says something like “hey, I’m just having a bad day so don’t take anything I do or don’t do personally” then we are liable to interpret their actions or looks or words the wrong way. Do you do that? I know I do and then I kick myself when I realize what I’ve done. But it’s taken me years to realize what it is that’s happened – it was ingrained in me as a child to just interpret and not ask – actually when I asked, I never believed the response so I just stopped asking and felt that I “knew” what the real truth was. That’s a worse scenario, believe me.

You don’t even know all the things you believe in. You may be able to spout off the basics “I believe in God”, “I believe in justice”, “I believe in the 10 commandments”, “I believe you’re innocent until proven guilty” (”well, maybe not all the time but I have to say I believe that”), etc.

But what do you believe about your self-worth, about your ability to succeed, about your ability to love and be loved, about your ability to perform in something you love doing? Look at your life and your dreams and desires and see what it is you believe. Because your thoughts and words reflect your beliefs and your actions reflect all of that most of all. Why not take a moment and write down what’s happened in your life – are you successful in business, relationships, happiness? What have you accomplished? Have you reached your goals? Did you ever have goals? Or did you just “settle” for what came your way? Did you have a reason (excuse) why you didn’t become that person you wanted to be when you were a child. For example, I wanted to be a neurosurgeon from the time I first saw the TV show “Ben Casey” (showing my age I know). But when I was 21 I developed epilepsy. That shot down any hopes of being a neurosurgeon. So that’s my “reason”. I could look alot more deeply into it and figure out how I created that reality but I don’t really care anymore since I found another direction and goal and was very happy with that. If, however, I had not been able to find something else, then I would have benefited from further exploration into my reason/excuse and see what was really going on.

This will be your starting point. Once you’ve written down all you’ve accomplished and all you wanted to accomplish, go back and figure out what it is you are lacking and see on that list of “wish I hads” that may still be sparking a desire within you. Then write down why you don’t have that particular thing. Be honest with yourself. No on else needs to see it. I think it might be revealing to you.

We’ll go a little deeper next time! But this will be a great start for you.

Terrie