Remember how we talk about where beliefs come from? Remember that one of the primary embedders of your beliefs were your parents? Yep, it starts at a very early age. Your parents instill the vast majority of your beliefs.

So what? Well, it’s important for us to realize as adults that a belief is just a thought we think over and over – and if our parents have repeated something many times, it most likely now has been chiseled into our subconscious mind like the 10 commandments in stone. The determination of what beliefs come from where and what to do about our own beliefs are subjects for many other posts.

I am addressing this to parents or teachers who are involved with children. You MUST watch what you say to them and around them. If you are constantly yelling, arguing or condemning and criticizing, think intensely about what that is doing to (or telling) your children. Do you really want to teach them your biases and prejudices? Do you want them to hear you talk about safe driving but then watch you text or talk on your cell phone while you drive them to school or another destination? Do you want them to adopt the phrases you use – “I’m fed up. I’m sick and tired. You’re killing me. You ALWAYS let me down. You NEVER pay attention to what I want. Etc” Do you really want them to learn those “Always and Nevers”?  Do you want them to hear you call people names – even if it’s just at a baseball game and you’re mad at the umpire “You stink, you lousy ump”?

Take some time to think about what it is you really do want them to hear and learn. Think of it this way – what do you want them to be embedding in their subconscious that could be traced back to you. Do you want them to be saddled with a belief that they aren’t good enough because you were having a bad day and they didn’t get a 100 on a test. I remember that vividly – I was asked “why didn’t you get a 100, Terrie”. I couldn’t understand why that was the response instead of joy and happiness at the 98 I had achieved.

Think before you speak. I imagine you give that advice to your kids all the time but do you practice what you preach?

If not, maybe you should start. Remember that the beliefs that your children will grow up embracing will have come from you. This has a tremendous bearing on their lives and ability to achieve success in life. Do your best to help them now.

Terrie