I found to be excellent advice after the past few weeks of just spinning my wheels. I have not known what to do to get out of this depression and despair from loss and pain. But, once I saw this, I realized that I just have to do something and then see which road it leads me down. A friend of mine also gave me the same advice and turns out she was right.

Taking some sort of action is one of the hardest things we all have to do sometimes. It just seems easier to simply stay put, not doing anything. But, all that does is cause you to sit and think more about your problems and where you are compared to where you want to be. That accomplishes nothing. You just sit around and feel worse – you feel worse because you’re thinking about those problems; you feel worse because you’re not doing the things you “should” be doing; you feel worse because you’re not interacting with those who want you to interact with them; you feel worse because life is just passing you by and you’re not accomplishing anything.

Figure out what you can do that would constitute that one tiny step.  In my instance a few weeks ago I decided that ok maybe I can’t run but let’s see if I can at least walk. So I got out and tried it. It didn’t feel great and I had to stop a lot because of the pain but what did feel great was the fact that I had tried to take control of my life and not let my “condition” rule me and my life. I am not my condition. But what matters is that that was one little step. Then I tried to do some cleaning – one space at a time.  That was ok too. So, each time I did something and started to take back my life, it filled me with hope and joy – and of course, we all know that joy releases endorphins which helps with mood and maybe even some degree of pain control. So, it’s all good all around.

Don’t stand there and just look at the fork in the road. Do something for yourself. Do something you haven’t done in a long time, something you enjoy. Some tiny little thing. Write it down too so you can determine how you felt once you did it. Write down how you felt before and how you felt after. I know that the first time I got my haircut after the shingles overtook my life, I felt great because I had some sense of normalcy back again. It’s amazing what little things do for you.

Try this if you’re having trouble deciding which direction to go in. I know I’m going to look at that fork in the road about my retirement. And I’m going to take one step forward down one of the two paths. And, we’ll see what happens!

Terrie