Do you like it when people judge you? And tell you what they think about how you look or act? I would bet not. I don’t like it. I worry about what people “think” – it can be about anything but I am concerned about being judged. I am sure that this is a result of being criticized so much when I was a child (probably as most people have endured – almost a right of passage). I grew up in a very critical geographical location and in addition to all the competition, there was an abundance of criticism if you didn’t “fit in”. And I can guarantee you that I didn’t fit in much.

I am grateful for one of my military assignments because it forced me to become an instructor and taught me how to stand in front of people (and people who didn’t want to be there) and teach them. This has served me ever since and helped me endure what I just “knew” was judgment no matter what I did. But that still didn’t keep me from thinking about it all the time.

As you know from all our teachings, all that thinking about it simply brought more judgment into my life (the Law of Attraction works so well).

All this has taught me that making judgments of others is a very bad idea. Because just as focusing on judgment of me brings me more judgment, so does me judging in others. Plus, what purpose does it serve. I think that people stand in judgment of others in order to make themselves feel good.  I know I’ve been guilty of that before even though it pains me to admit it. When we are insecure and feeling less than positive, it’s “natural” to look outside ourselves in order to find something to feel good about. So, if you can find something that isn’t as you think it should be, then it will help you “feel better” by making that statement (either out loud or to yourself).

But,  we should be able to find other ways to feel good without putting other people down. We have to break ourselves of these habits. That’s not easy but once again it’s all about awareness. Once you realize that you’re making some judgment, immediately stop yourself. Then ask “what if I were that person? How would I feel knowing that someone were saying or thinking such things about me?” Of course, this is an extension of the Golden Rule but that’s always been good practice for people to follow. Simply say “I love you” when you catch yourself being judgmental. That’s pretty simple and doesn’t require any special techniques and certainly doesn’t require any extra effort on your part.

While you’re at it, though, ask yourself “who the heck am I to judge anyone? What ares of my life are less than ideal and could be criticized by others?” Once you start to ask that, you should become very humble unless, of course, you are perfect – and if you are, please let us all know.

It may help you to use the word “criticize” instead of “judge” because, to me, they are the same thing. Why would you make any judgment unless you’re criticizing something. Sure, you can judge something as “good” but that’s not usually what we mean when we say that word – “judge”. Criticism is very harsh so if you substitute this for judgment it might help you decrease your use of it.

Are you willing to try it? See if you can refrain from judgment/criticism for a designated period of time? Remember the post about trying something new for 30 days? Is this going to be it for the next 30 days?

Terrie

The post Who Are You To Judge? first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.