Can you imagine my surprise (and happiness) when my wonderful trainer, Dan, brought me into the office and showed me this! And then said it was for me – at first I thought it was something he had won but then I saw my name! This is, perhaps, the most meaningful gift I’ve ever received because this is from the one person who went through all the trials and tribulations with me to get me through all my endurance events. It was because of him that I could truly embody what he says I embody and inspire.

Dan has changed my life in so many ways in the two years I’ve been working with him now. He is always upbeat and supportive and never ever lets any of us down. He even went to the New York City Marathon when I had decided not to go due to Superstorm Sandy. But he gave me the courage to prepare for that event and to know that I could do it if I had gone. Just in case you missed the whole story, he did definitely get something out of it – he got engaged to a wonderful woman who is the perfect match for him.

He then supported me and trained me to build the muscle, courage and fearlessness to do two 50 milers and two 100 milers in the space of a few short months. I’m no easy person to deal with when I’m not stressed out for a big event that will fulfill a 15 year dream so you can imagine how much fun he had seeing me 3 times a week during that entire period. Yet, he was always there encouraging me and telling me I could do it.

Then he showed up in the middle of the night for my first 100 mile  event and cheered me on in a way I’ve never been supported before.

He is such a good, honest and wholesome man that I often feel as if I don’t deserve to have him as my trainer or friend. And then when I realize he’s stuck with me, I thank God for all my great and wonderful blessings and he is pretty close to number 1 on that list of blessings.

He even created this saying and it has brought tears to my eyes several times since I received this beautiful gift. His words mean more than anything and could have just stood alone but when you combine them with the beauty of this statue, there is nothing better.

Here’s what he wrote!

Thank you Dan!

The post Wow Am I Blessed! first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

Still working on your Success List? Having problems, perhaps, figuring out what you want to be or what qualities you want to embrace? Take a look at this system and see if it will help you with your planning. January should be a month of preparation. Ideally December should be that month but everyone is so busy with the holidays (although this should be a part of the holidays) that they don’t have time for anything else. So, continue to use January to figure out where you are and where you want to go.

One of the best ways to take a look at the things in your life that you wish to change this to look at others around you. Try this exercise. Write down a list of 3 to 5 people depending on how much time you have that are in your life right now. Next to each name list of qualities that you like about that person, and the qualities that you don’t like about that person. Another way to do this is to list 3 to 5 people that you don’t like that are in your life right now. And on a separate list you can list 3 to 5 other people that are in your life that you do like.

Regardless of how you decide to do it you now have a list of qualities that you can take a look at. How many of these qualities are qualities that you see in yourself ones who really hone in and force yourself to take a deep look at yourself.

People come into your life for a reason. Once you identify the qualities about these people you’ve attracted you can either work to eliminate the bad qualities in yourself that these people are mirror and; or you can work to even augment the good qualities that you see in yourself.

Remember that we are in control of our lives. We’re in control of how we behave, what our attitudes are like, what our thoughts reflect, and most of all what other people see in us. So use the reflection of others in your life to help you mould who you want to be. in fact this is a good way to create a checklist for yourself. Use this checklist in the daily weekly or monthly basis to see where you’ve come in your goals of improving certain qualities in your life. You may not have to develop qualities. You may just have to refine them and it’s a lot easier there already and you but you just have to make their manifestation better.

I write this from experience because it happened to me more than one time. Often a new person will come into my life and it’s a person that I’m not ecstatic exactly ecstatic with. When I write down a list of persons qualities and then I’m very honest with myself, I see myself as if I’m looking in a mirror. however this is been the most important time of my life because it gives me the opportunity to examine qualities that other people see in me, and change the things I want people to see. What’s funny is as soon as you adequately change or modify those qualities that person begins to fade from your life. If you look back over your life you can see how this is probably been the case with you if you’ve paid attention to what that person supposed to mean in your life.

Just as a reminder list 3 to 5 people in your life and write down the good qualities in the bad qualities you see in them. Take a deep look at yourself and determine if these are qualities that you have. If they are to choose to keep them what you want to change. Start working on yourself and then repeat the process and perhaps 3 to 6 months. See enough either that person is no longer in your life or perhaps that person is changed as well.

Terrie

The post The Mirror of Your Mind first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

We talked about this in November but here’s another of Napoleon Hill’s works where he describes the 10 attributes of Initiative and Leadership. They help elaborate on the Qualities of Leadership discussed in November with different wording. Take them in and use them to build your talents.

1. Know definitely what you want (your definite major purpose)

2. Build a practical plan or plans for the achievement of that which you want, making use of the counsel and advice of your Master Mind Group.

3. Surround yourself with an organization made up of men who h ave the knowledge and experience essential for carrying out your Definite Aim.

4. Have sufficient faith in yourself and in your plans to see your aim a finished reality even before you begin to carry out your plans.

5. Do not become discouraged no matter what obstacles you meet. If one plan fails to work substitute other plans until you have found one that will work.

6. Do no guessing but get the facts as the basis for all your plans.

7. Do not be influenced by others to abandon your plans or your aim.

8. Have no set hours of labor. The leader must devote to his task whatever hours are necessary for success.

9. Concentrate upon one thing at a time as you cannot dissipate thought and energy and still be efficient.

10. Whenever possible relegate to others the responsibility of details, but have a system for checking your subordinates to see that these details are accurately attended to. Hold yourself accountable at all times for carrying out all of your plans, bearing in mind that if subordinates fail, it is is you yourself who has failed.

What’s happened in your life in the past month? How has your life changed as a result of our review of the quailities of leadership.

Terrie

The post The Major Attributes of Initiative and Leadership first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

Qualities of Leadership – Interacting With & For Others

* The capacity to take criticism without resentment.

* Willingness to accept full responsibility for the mistakes of subordinates.

* The habit of recognizing the merits and abilities of others.

* The habit of assuming full responsibility for any job or task undertaken.

 * Patience with subordinates and associates.

 For today, I picked the qualities of leadership that had to do with working with others.

 The first quality listed is the ability to take criticism without resentment. This is NOT easy at all. It takes cultivating. It takes realizing that the criticism is something that can be used to grow and be used to get closer to your definite major purpose.

 It’s so hard not to believe that the criticism is not directed against you as a person and doesn’t mean you’re a bad person.

 You have to learn to take the information given and use it to whatever advantage you can come up with. This may be one of the toughest leadership qualities you have to develop. But work on it.

 The other qualities listed have to do with working with others while protecting them and standing up for them. This is where you have to develop understanding of others and cultivate patience when working with them. I guess being in the Navy helped me with these qualities. The Captain of the ship always was responsible for what went down no matter whose fault it was. You cannot blame others when you’re a leader. You just accept things the way they are and look at what happened in the light of what can be improved.

 It’s human nature to want to pass the buck and put blame where it’s due. But you cannot do that and be a true leader.  This will help you stop talking about people and keep you concentrated on your work, your definite major purpose.

 Look at your life, your interactions, see how these principles apply to you.

 Let us know what you discover.

 Terrie



The post Leadership – Interacting With Others first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

Going The Extra Mile

This is one of the most important qualities of leadership for sure. It’s even more important to think about in this day and time.

How often do you feel you go the extra mile? What does “going the extra mile” mean to you? Even more importantly, what feelings did just reading that phrase generate inside of you? I mention that because even though I think that I do go the extra mile when I was writing this question to you I felt butterflies in my stomach! And I’ve done this for many years. So, there is obviously something in my past or inner soul that is stirred by this thought. Perhaps it’s the commitment that’s required because of making that statement in public. I don’t really know. I’ll have to work on it. I confess all this because I know that you might be feeling anxiety at having to even think about going the extra mile. Please, though, don’t let that stop you.

You can read about people who are successful and how they all went the extra mile. What that means is different for each person but it certainly does involve “stretching”.

To succeed you just HAVE to stretch. We’ve talked about stretching when we’ve talked about tithing. If you were having trouble stretching with tithing, you may not be ready to become a leader. Again I’m not trying to aggravate or irritate anyone but you have to be able to do what’s needed. Maybe you have to work longer or maybe you have to reach out to people in your community and help them.

A key element in going the extra mile is doing it without complaining. There is a great element of entitlement in this day and a feeling that things should be “free” or that an individual is “owed” something. You’ll have to examine your theories about that too.

When was the last time you went beyond what was expected of you? Was it something that you were able to do without even being asked? Was it something you were expected to do but you did it faster, more quickly, more thoroughly?

Tell us about it and about the thoughts and feelings you experience when writing about this.

Terrie



The post Leadership – Going The Extra Mile first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

Decision Making – here’s two more qualities we want to focus on:

    * The habit of reaching definite and prompt decisions.
    * The habit of basing opinions on known facts instead of relying on guesswork.

Examine your ability to make decisions and make them quickly. Are you like me in my non-work life – I ruminate over and over on things – is this the right thing to do? Should I do it this way? Should I do it that way? What might happen? Etc…..

This is in complete contradiction to my work life. As an ER doctor, I have to make quick decisions and they ahve to be based on facts – but in the ER you don’t have alot of time to gather those facts. So, that’s a talent you cultivate and improve constantly.

In my other work (the military disability system) I have to be able to make quick decisions in order to keep the workload going. This, too, is based on my many years of experience doing this job.

What is your decision making process? Write down some things that you do well and some that you may not do as well as you’d like. Write down the things that are hard for you to make decisions about. What can you do to improve the process?

What can you do to make it rapid decision making a habit for you? For a week, pay attention to the decisions you have to make and how long it takes you as well as what you base those decisions on. At the end of the week decide if this has improved your process. Decide what, if anything, it has done for you?

Write it down. I have to continually emphasize that writing these things down (on paper or in the computer) will solidify them in your mind.

Let us know what’s been happening in your life. Has it seemed to move more quickly? That’s good. Has it seem improved with less anxiety.

Terrie
 

The post Leadership – Decision Making first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

Let’s talk about a group of Leadership Qualities today:

  * Self-reliance in proportion to the scope and object of your major purpose.
 
  * Self-discipline sufficient to insure mastery of the head and the heart, and to sustain your motives   until they have been realized.

  * Persistence, based on the will to win.
 
  * A well-developed imagination, controlled and directed.

Self-reliance and self-discipline are vital to your success. This is not necessarily something we want to hear because it then means we have to take responsibility for all our thoughts and actions. Even though we teach this in New Thought, making a commitment to apply it to ourselves in our everyday life is a major undertaking. Once we’ve made that commitment it’s not a viable option to say “ah well, maybe next week when I feel more like doing it”. A commitment is a commitment and something we should take seriously – just as seriously when it comes to our own actions as when it is relative to others.

You have to learn to rely on yourself as well. You can’t get easily discouraged and just give up. You know that. But applying this is also not so easy – unless you make the commitment. This is not to say that you have to be isolated. At first glance this seems contradictory to using the mastermind alliance and also inspiring others. However, it’s not.

It means that you must have the ability to rely on yourself to get things started and to keep them going against all odds. Keep your definite major purpose at the forefront of your mind at all times. When you do that, you can’t help but rely on that inner strength.

I talked about persistence when I told you about my attempts to get into medical school. You hear people talk about the fact that many people quit just before they would have succeeded. So, if you think “this is dumb, I’m not getting anywhere”, regroup and remind yourself that although you may not be able to see your success, it really is there because you have created it in your mind and refined it to fit what YOU want!

I think that the principle about the well-developed imagination should go earlier in the list – however, who am I to argue with Napoleon Hill? He is the master (he studied success for 20 years). You have to continue to use your imagination to always refine your definite major purpose. Now, I don’t mean to change the whole thing – I mean to make tweaks and more specifics based on what is happening. You can see more about the outcome as things go along. I have to reiterate though – you are NOT to change your definite major purpose. If you’ve researched it as Mr. Hill recommends (see the many posts on this blog about it or just pick up any of his books), it really is what you ARE SUPPOSED to do in life. But as circumstances change, different aspects of it and how you go about it might change. That’s where the imagination comes in. Use it continuously. The more you imagine your outcome, the more likely you’ll be able to manifest it exactly as you envision it.

Terrie

The post Leadership – Self-reliance, self-discipline, Imagination first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

Qualities of Leadership – Mastermind Alliance

  * A master mind alliance through which you may acquire the power to attain your definite purpose.

Do you have people you brainstorm with? Not the ones you sit around and moan and groan with but those who support you and your definite major purpose and are willing to positively point you in the correct directions and guide you with advice?

Even if you don’t have that in the real world, you can create a mastermind alliance on an imaginary basis. You can pick people from history or people in your world that you can’t ask for some reason. You can pick Lincoln, Mother Theresa, Einstein, anyone that you respect and consider to be a great leader and someone that will support you. Napoleon Hill writes about that too. He tells you to write down the qualities of those people and vow to emulate them.

For a mastermind you can imagine (yes, it’s ok to have imaginary friends) them sitting around a big table with you. You put forth your definite major purpose and tell them what you’ve worked on this week and then where you want advice, suggestions, pointers etc. Then go around the table and listen to what they tell you. If you put yourself in the proper spiritual mood they actually will “talk” to you. Try it a couple of times. Don’t just try it once and give up. You can try it with people you know – positive people- first if you want. Do this if you find it hard to believe that these famous people will interact with you.

Whether you use a mastermind of actual people or of imaginary people, it’s important to open yourself to others POSITIVE suggestions.

Try it, you’ll like it!

Let us know what happens. Comment below.

Terrie

The post Leadership – Mastermind Alliance first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.

More on the Qualities of Leadership – The Motive To Inspire

Here’s the second and third quality of leadership:

* The adoption of a definite major purpose.
* A motive to inspire continuous action in pursuit of a definite major purpose.

There’s plenty of posts recently on the definite major purpose and I recommend you search for that subject and review it. Your “definite major purpose” is not just a goal. It’s something that’s your passion, your life – it’s what you want to use to make a mark on the world!

Once you have that definite major purpose, what do you do with it? Do you talk to others about that? Do you become passionate in your conversation? Do you inspire them to want to know more?

Why not? How are you going to achieve your definite major purpose by yourself? My definite major purpose was to become a doctor. When I was 4 I decided I wanted to become a doctor. There was no doubt in my mind. I told everyone I knew. When they said “oh you mean a nurse” I made certain to correct them.

And when I initially wasn’t accepted into medical school my determination did NOT waiver. Maybe it was persistence as some have said but more likely it was because I “knew” no other definite major purpose. I wanted to care for sick people but to be able to do something to ease their discomfort. I despise being or feeling helpless – so the way to do that was to become a doctor. I never wavered and eventually got in to medical school.

The reasons why it was right for me NOT to be accepted initially would fill a book (and one I should write) but I won’t go into that here. Bottom line was that I got in and became a doctor.

But you know what? I achieved my definite major purpose but the day I graduated I had this sensation “Is that all there is?” That’s because I had not refined my definite major purpose to know what I was supposed to do once I became a doctor. That is the most important lesson I could impart. And if you read about the definite major purpose you’ll see that you should be extremely detailed – you should take your time to refine your aim. You need to solidify it.

Then you need to get people on board! That’s the inspiration and motivation.

Whenever I’ve wanted to make changes in my ERs or any of my assignments, I’ve had much greater success when I’ve decided what needs to be done and then solicited help from everyone involved. I had to get them onboard or there wouldn’t be any reason for them to support the change (or me). Then things take on a life of their own and the people make it happen.

Think about how this has or can apply in your life. Tell us about it!

Terrie

The post Inspire & Motivate Others first appeared on Getting Unstuck, LLC.