Category Archives: Feelings

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How We Let Things Derail Us (Traffic, Lights, Other Drivers, Long Lines, etc)

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derailed1Have you ever noticed that you’re in a great mood and then all of a sudden you plummet and the anger, frustration, or impatience just hits and BAM! you’re down in the dumps or at least on some other track?

This can happen so easily. You can spend a rewarding early morning with your spouse and kids or exercising and then head on to work. Even if you’re not running late when you get stopped at one of those traffic lights, you let it get to you. Then, with even “worse luck” you hit another red light or someone is driving slow in “your” lane….and on and on and on. It seems that one thing leads to another until, by the time you get to work, you’re in a foul mood. “Why me?” goes through your mind “What did I do today for this to be happening to me?”

Has this ever happened to you? It has me..and unless I catch myself, it’s one big spiral downward. But, if I catch myself, then things can be turned around so easily. How do I do that?

Once I recognize that I’m starting to percolate, I start to look inside for “Kodak Moments” and think about them. I find (in my mind and memory) people I love and care about, events that have made me laugh, jokes that people have told me, or I just look around and start doing a Rampage of Appreciation about the things that are around me. I see how smart people were that created the buildings in the area, how the roads have been structured and intersected, all the different cars that surround me, etc. In our wonderful country it’s never hard to find something to appreciate. It’s amazing how much we take for granted when it’s so easy to simply express appreciation to the Universe for us being able to live here and enjoy everything we have.  Doing a Rampage of Appreciation is the best way to receive more from the Universe – more good instead of the bad thoughts and feelings that were beginning to take over.

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Where Do I Start?

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square_oneOften I get asked this question – Where do I start?

The first thing I have to ask is “start doing what?” I need to know what you’re after, what your goal is. I can’t tell you how to get to New York if I don’t know a) that you want to go there and b) where you are right now. Sure I could give you general directions to New York City but that would be my determination of where I thought you wanted to go. That’s not what you’re after I’m sure.

So you have to be specific about where you’re headed. Do you know what you want should be the first question. Then you need to know why you want “it”.

Thanks to Michael Hyatt for bringing these questions to my attention. I think they’ll help anyone who is going through any type of uncomfortable “situation” right now. The answers to these questions will help you figure out where you want to go. Sometimes just asking the questions will raise your vibrations and bring you into a much better state. Just as Abraham says – you won’t find the solution as long as you’re focused on the problem. You have to focus on the solution.

The answers we get are often determined by the questions we ask. If we ask bad questions, we will get bad answers. If we ask better questions—empowering questions—we will get better answers.

If you are going through a difficult, uncertain time, here are seven better questions you can ask yourself (and your team which can be defined in any way you want – basically it’s a group of people who are there to book_searching_for_answers_400_clr_12525a support you). You can also just use the questions for any situation you’re in, difficult or not. These questions are great for general life assessment:

  1. What if this isn’t the end but a new beginning? Just asking this question will put you in a better space. It’s always better to think of a beginning than an end. What can you get out of this, what good can come from this situation.
  2. What if the answer to my prayer is just over the next hill? This reminds me of Winston Churchill’s “Don’t ever quit”.  If you stop now, you’ll never know what’s over the hill. What if the hill is just a few hundred feet away and not the miles you think it is. What if it really won’t take the immense amount of effort you think it will? Perception is often said to be reality. You can change your perception of this situation too. You can see that hill as conquerable. You can use the mantra of the ultrarunner – relentless forward motion. Keep on going.
  3. What if this is necessary in order for me to be prepared for the next important chapter in my life? This can be a scary question to answer. But it’s important. When you were ready to start school, you didn’t just start with college did you? You had to build up to that. Similarly, life events teach you about the next step and help you learn to take that step.
  4. What if God (or the Universe if you prefer) knows exactly what I need at this particular time? Again Abraham says that the Universe brings you everything you ask for. But there is the Law of Gestation that I keep talking about. I tell you that if you plant an acorn you can’t dig it up ever day and ask “where’s the oak tree”. But, you also can’t just plant it and keep food and water from it and expect it to grow. There are things that are needed to support that gestation. Same with bringing you what you want. There are steps and the Universe knows what those steps are. Have faith in that.
  5. What does this experience make possible? This is a really important question to ask.  Does it force you to slow down? To re-evaluate your life? To stop spending so much time at work? To spend more time with your family? Does it give you the opportunity and time to write and be creative – to do something you’ve wanted to do for so long? What can you do because of this situation that you were putting off or just “didn’t get to”
  6. What will I be telling my grandchildren that I learned was so valuable in this season of my life? Or if you don’t have grandchildren, what will you write in your memoirs. Another way to look at it is what would you like people to remember about you?

Take these 6 questions and write out the answers. Be serious about it. Date your page (or write in your journal). Write down how you feel and what vibrational state are you in before you start answering the questions. Then take as long as you need to answer them. At the end, record how you feel. Is there a difference? Do you feel as if life is more manageable at this point? What did you learn just from answering the questions? Where do you want to head now?

Use these questions as your starting point. They help with clarity for moving forward instead of staying stuck where you are right now.

Let me know if you enjoy answering the questions.

Terrie

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Is Worry In Your Way?

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anxious_scared_figure_400_clr_8434I realized last Saturday that I was letting all my worry about many different things get in the way of my enjoying life and actually making me miserable. What a cruddy way to be living day to day.

What was I worried about? It’s all around my upcoming race in July – the one across the state of Tennessee. I was worried about my gear – which pack should I use? How can I make it lighter? What shoes should I wear? Was I going to get blisters? What if my feet swelled so much so that the shoes no longer worked? What if I couldn’t handle the heat and sun? What if this, what if that? You name it, I could worry about it.

I was doing two long runs every weekend – it had gotten so that I was looking forward to going to work on Monday – can’t say as I ever thought that way before.

I finally had a realization. Why the heck was I worrying so much? Here I am telling people that the whole purpose of life is to experience joy and that we can and should experience it NOW, NOT when whatever it is we’re after manifests itself. And I was doing just what I was preaching against. What a hypocrite.

Despite not wanting to be a hypocrite, I also didn’t like not enjoying where I was right then and there – or more accurately – here and now. I have been looking forward to this run for a year now and here I was making myself miserable as the time drew nearer. I was creating all the bad things that could possibly happen just by worrying. And what good was worrying going to do anyway? Preparation is not the same as worrying.

I knew what I had to do. I knew that I had been down for the count for 9 weeks and although that bothered me and I was concerned that it put me behind the eight ball, training wise, there was absolutely nothing I could do about it at this point. So why keep dwelling on it (aka “worrying”). Did that improve my endurance? Of course not. All I could do was do what I was able to do right now.

What good was worrying about how hot it might be, or how heavy my pack was? Ok, thinking about these two things led me to be able to prepare – I trained in the heat of the day to try to get acclimatized. I wore my pack with all the gear and water I would be carrying for 10 days. That’s preparation. There was no need to worry because there was not a darn thing else I could do and worrying would not make it cooler in Tennessee nor would it help me acclimatize to anything other than more worry.  I think we’re all pretty acclimatized to that – we do it without even knowing that we’re doing it.

So, all worry could do would be to make me miserable and not enjoy my time leading up to the race. And it put me in a negative vibrational state and great things do NOT come when you’re in such a state. I was likely to attract things I didn’t want.

I simply decided to think about the variables and plan appropriately and then enjoy what I was doing. When a problem arose or something that I needed to deal with, I expressed gratitude and appreciation that it had come up prior to the run so that I really could deal with it. That is preparation. There was nothing negative in it at all. I went about enjoying the two days I had left with long runs. Instead of wishing I was home doing something else, I concentrated on the event and how great it was going to be to participate and meet other folks – both runners and those along the way.

I stopped worrying about “what if I don’t finish?” knowing that I would do the best I could and whatever happened, happened. I would only quit if things were really bad for me (injury that would prevent continuing). I was in this to find out what I was made of and that was what would happen. I was not going to lose my job or my pride if I didn’t finish. All of the other people in my normal life wouldn’t even consider trying it. There was no “face” to lose. Just do the best you can, Terrie. And that’s what will happen. I visualize the outcome and that’s what’s important.

If worry is in your way, take a different look at it.  Worry is also a form of fear so look at your fears and find out if you’re really “worried” (socially acceptable) or “afraid” (not so much acceptable).  Are your fears realistic? If so, are they something that would keep you from accomplishing your goal? If so, then reconsider the goal. If not, then acknowledge them and put them aside.

  • Remember why you’re doing what it is you’re doing.
  • Feel the joy that the achievement of this goal will bring.
  • Plan and prepare. Look at any event/thought/obstacle that comes up as part of your preparation. Don’t focus on it, work on it.
  • Enjoy what you are doing right now.

Terrie

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Laws Are NOT Made To Be Broken

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laws not to be broken 1You often hear people say “rules are made to be broken”. Even though it sometimes is meant as a joke, people often are serious. They feel it’s ok to break rules and as long as they aren’t “caught”, everything’s fine and dandy.

When it comes to the Universal laws, however, there is no breaking them. Take the most known one – the Law of Attraction – for instance. How would you break the “Law”? By focusing on the things that you don’t want all the while expecting what you want to show up in your life.  The Universe does not respond to words – “I want a million dollars”. It responds to your feelings, your vibrations – “I have so many blasted bills to pay, I’ll never get anywhere since I just don’t have enough money”. Even while writing this I could feel the frustration and even despair that would be in someone’s voice if they were saying that. Those are the emotions. There’s frustration, despair, helplessness, anger, depression, disappointment, etc. These are what the Universe responds to. And, as such, this is what you will receive – more lack, more bills. Why? That is the Law – you receive what you ask for and by concentrating on or focusing on the lack, the bills, that is what the Universe thinks you’re asking for – more of it.

“But I can’t escape reality” you say. “The reality is that I have all these bills ad I’m NOT making a million dollars nor do I see how I ever could. How do you expect me to believe and focus on that?” I don’t. I know that it would seem unrealistic and unbelievable for you to believe you have a million dollars when you have a load of bills to pay. You can’t lie to yourself. Well, you could lie to yourself but you wouldn’t believe that lie. So how do you keep from breaking the Law.

You change what you’re thinking about and focusing on. If you’re ill and have a less than desirable diagnosis, you won’t be able to change that just by making an affirmation. So, you have to find something else to focus on – that Kodak moment I keep referring to. When you are thinking about something that makes you feel good or accomplished, then you build up your momentum and your entire body energy alters and that energy will go about working all throughout your body to try to facilitate manifestation of health.

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The YOUniverse

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youniverse With all the talk we’ve done about vibrations and momentum, it’s so important to realize that EVERYTHING in your life is centered around YOU. That’s why you should think of your surroundings as your YOUniverse.

No, this is NOT selfish but it is self-centered. Most people have a negative reaction to that phrase too – self-centered. But, if you understand the Law of Attraction and the fact that you create everything in your life, you will realize that this requires self-centeredness (is that a word?).

However, this concept is also the most generous and giving there is. Because if you get your own momentum going in the direction you wish (some call it positive although there really is no positive and negative when it comes to emotions) and your vibrations are elevated, you will be doing more for those around you than you can by taking conscious actions.

When you create your world, it’s so important that you focus on the things that make you feel good. Focusing on them will bring more of that good feeling into your life. Remember that you only have to “Ask” the Universe once for something. Then move on to raising your vibration and getting yourself in the right space (vibration) to accept what you have asked for. That 3rd step is the hardest part for us humans. We “ask” all the time – any time we think about something for more than 17 seconds we’ve essentially asked for more of it.  After we’ve asked, the Universe immediately provides it – but what happened? It sure hasn’t appeared as a physical manifestation in your life. So does that mean it doesn’t work? No, it means two things, one of which we should be very grateful for – we cannot immediately manifest things in our life – there is the Law of Gestation which means that things come into your life when the time is right. Dr. Kunath used to use a great example in her own  life. When her kids were little she recognized one day how grateful she was that she didn’t immediately manifest what she said. She found herself looking out the door and seeing her kids playing on top of the neighbor’s roof. She screamed at them “Get down from there – you’re going to fall and break your neck”. At that moment she realized that we needed much more Divine Wisdom to be able to immediately manifest. Otherwise some of the really stupid things we say would actually come true. She also gave a presentation at one of the big international conferences on “Oops, what do you do when you get what you asked for”.  Something to think about for sure. Thank goodness for the requirement for 68 seconds of focus (concentrating on something for a series of 4 consecutive 17 second periods puts the Universe into action bringing you what you’ve asked for). Most people can’t (or don’t) focus on one thing for that long.

The second implication from not receiving what we ask for (or so it seems) is even more important. We must “Allow” the physical manifestation to come into our life.  Many times this is because we’ve been taught that we shouldn’t ask for things or 1236855_603864969656204_580817517_nthat we have to deserve something or earn something.  We have all sorts of limiting beliefs – beliefs that keep us from accepting that we are deserving, we are worthy of receiving what we’ve asked for.  That’s where the vibration/emotions and momentum comes into play. Concentrating on your YOUniverse and how you feel and think and act with the express purpose of being at the highest vibration possible while generating and maintaining momentum on a higher plane will put you in a space where you allow the Universe to bring you what you asked for. Remember my analogy of placing your order (asking), the company fulfills and ships the order (the Universe gives you what you’ve asked for). The shipper is at your front door but if you don’t answer the door or open it to receive what you’ve ordered, you will continually think that your order has not been filled. And you’ll get disappointed, discouraged and disbelieving.

It’s so important for you to work on realizing that what you have in your life is something you’ve asked for at another time in your life. Make a list of the good and bad things that you’ve experienced and see if at some point in the past you hadn’t been concerned or focused on something of that nature.

Being positive, by itself, won’t work. You can say affirmations all day long (and I’m a big believer in affirmations), but if you haven’t cleared the land of your limiting beliefs (especially the self-worth and deserving beliefs), you will blocking the good from coming into your life. For example, you can say affirmations in the morning and the evening but if all day long, you’re thinking about those bills you can’t pay, that is what’s prominent in your vibrations and feelings. As such, you’ve spent much more time on the not having enough money to pay your bills, that you will receive more and more of that as long as you continue thinking that way.

This is why my YOUniversal phrases are (I know I repeat them a lot but they have gotten me out of trouble so many times that I can’t say them enough):

“That is not my truth”

“Nothing and nobody can interfere with my prosperity, well-being and peace of mind, not even myself!”

And say them with emphasis. Keep saying them until your fear or anxiety level has significantly decreased and you can focus on one of your “Kodak Moments” stored in the album in your mind – mine is always running related and it works!

Concentrating on your life will bring you all you need to provide the love and kindness for others that you really want to. You hear all the time that you have to love yourself before you can love others. That applies in every aspect of your life.

Start working more in your YOUniverse and remember the 17 second rule (four periods of focusing for 17 seconds will get you to 68 seconds and that is essential for bringing the manifestation into your life).

Terrie